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    LEASE YOUR SOUL to 'BOB" for SAFEKEEPING! - watch the "interest" GROW and GROW!
                            YOU'LL NEVER GET A BETTER DEAL

   The SubGenius material has only recently been made public. This is YOUR chance to
   get in on the ground floor of a huge, lucrative cult -- NOW, while rates are
   still so very low. You will then be eligible for all the $$$, weird sex, and
   SHEER POWER OVER OTHERS that go with high-ranking membership in the Church. And
   yes, YOU CAN PERFORM LEGAL WEDDINGS!

   Overcome shyness and guilt with this fantastic replacement for a huge penis or
   "perfect" breasts.  Read THE STARK FIST OF REMOVAL and learn not only the Word
   of Dobbs but also ways to contact, buy from, and sell to the incredible (yet
   real!!) network of SubGenii and subsymps everywhere. Learn of local revivals,
   other secret societies, UNUSUAL PRODUCTS, Other Mutants. THIS IS NO FAKE. Puts
   you "in charge" of your life. You'll be READY the next time your face is on fire.
   Quick Condown Clampspiracy release. Easy on delicate tissues... no danger of
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                                       You get:

                                   Pamphlets #1 & 2
                 Your Own Personal 8x11 suitable-for-framing DOBBSHEAD
                       Official Dobbshead/Church Logo Metal Pin
                           Dobbshead Sticker, Bumper Sticker
                                 The SubGenius Pledge
                         The Divine Excuse (signed by "Bob"!)
                (WHAT OTHER RELIGIONS CHARGE ALL WORLDLY GOODS FOR!!!)
                            Doktorate of Forbidden Sciences
     (Be a Doktor INSTANTLY.  Incredible, sinister super-miniaturized fine print
   details all the scores of Church Ranks and Titles from which YOU can CHOOSE. 11 x
                 17 inches, suitable for framing. Signed by... "Bob")
                          Propaganda flyers to copy, Stickers
                        Wallet sized, SubGenius MINISTER'S CARD
                  (Without that card you have NO HOPE on July 5th!!!)
                    Minister's Ordination papers and instructions.
              The STARK FIST of Removal online / SCRUBGENIUS secret forum
                              The Dobbs.town Mirror news
     (they're full of rants, art, Prescriptures, doctrine, charts, filth, comics,
                          reviews and CHURCH NEWS & CONTACTS)
   This is the only way to get on the Mailing List of the Chosen, pierce the shroud
     of secrecy insulating the cult, join the secret MEMBERS-ONLY online forum and
   obtain such privileges as befit membership in a secret society of this scope. And
       all of it, including the surgery, can be done BY MAIL. Everything is kept
   STRICTLYCONFIDENTIAL (unless you want your local Clench listed). And don't worry
                                  about the diseases
                          -- they're part of the satire, too!
             If he hasn't seen your $44.99, you're still "Pink" to "Bob".
                             SIGN UP NOW AND SAVE $5000!!
                          Order Now and be INSTANTLY ORDAINED

   REGARDING GIFT ORDAINMENTS: Our Paypal-based shopping cart has an area where you
     can tell us to, for instance, send the package to someone else. The recipient
    fills out the necessary forms, so don't worry about your name being engraved on
             something meant for another person. Thanks and Praise "Bob".

                                        $44.99
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                            Also see [1]SubGenius Videos

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                          [3]Main Catalog, More Holy Products

References

   Visible links:
   1. https://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/video.htm
   2. https://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/mediashack.html
   3. https://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/mediashack.html

   Hidden links:
   5. https://www.subgenius.com/scatalog/video.htm